Category Archives: firsts

Crash Into You

I’ve been looking at the calendar  as yet another summer comes to a close. Fall is just around the corner, I could feel and smell the crispness of the autumn air. It’s no secret that it is my favorite season of the year. It’s no secret nor coincidence either that it was the same season that I first fell for a guy. My heart got subsequently broken in the process but that’s just how it goes. What didn’t kill me only made me stronger.

Jaded — check. Cynical —  a big, fat check. But despite those, I don’t know, I’m still a romantic at heart although I’m not as naive as I was. Like I’ve always said, I’m not the same person I was two years ago. Even a few months ago. Hell, even five minutes ago! But some people and some people say that some love(s) stay with you. That’s just how it goes.

What if you want to leave that piece of you behind? Like how trees shed their leaves in preparation for the long winter ahead. It’s a bit unfair, don’t you think? It’s unfair that that part of yesterday will always be with you and you’ve got no say about it. No matter how things change. How people change.

But I know better now. I know better now not to confuse love with lust. Nor with want or need. Nor a yes when it really meant no.

I have learned to be my own person. Granted, I might be a singleton at the moment but I still long for the flutters, that one spontaneous spark. I still wish on that same shooting star that maybe, maybe just this once, it’d let me crash into you.

 

xoxo

 

Tippy Toes

Him: Haha yeah.  How tall are you again? You don’t mind a guy who is 6’1” do                   you?

Her: I’m 5’2” with an added half an inch on most mornings lol.. and no I don’t                    mind you being a lot taller than me.

Him: I don’t. I like that height.

Her: Cool. I’m glad we’re on the same page.

Him: Just have to lean down for hugs and kisses but that’s ok.  Just a sacrifice                    that has to be made.

Her: Awww… that or I could either stand on my tippy toes or wear high heels.

Him: True.  That’s cute.  Made me smile.

Her: I believe in compromise. That and an open communication. I’m the type                  of person who says what I mean and means what I say.

Him: That’s a good compromise.  I think if that does happen (you on your                            tippy toes) I will probably think back to this conversation and smile.

Her: You’re making me blush  … that’s so sweet.

Him: I blushed when you said the tippy toes and heels thing.

Her: Well I have to make up for some of the height difference, right? But I think                it’s actually romantic heehee….

Him: I do, too.  Are you affectionate?

Her: With the right person, yes. I like holding hands and long hugs and tender                    kisses.

Him: That sounds perfect.  I feel the same way.

xoxo

Laundry List (Part Deux)

In accordance to an earlier post………

Things I needed to do and hopefully accomplish before or by the time I turn 30:

 1.   Be a full fledged physical therapist —   I’ve got two months left!

2.   Lose another 20 – 25 lbs — having a weight loss challenge with friends

3.   Pay off my car. I only have a few months left on it  :)  — one more month!!!!!

4.   Read Dan Brown’s new novel,  “The Lost Symbol”  — I don’t have enough downtime .. what between Facebook, Tumblr and my blog, I need more  ”me”  time :)

5.   Have my car detailed. I haven’t done it since I bought it LOL… car washes — yep, detailing — to follow —  well I’ve got no excuse — I’ve just been lazy

6.   Buy a new laptop —  my old one has so much sentimental value :(

7.   Go to Disneyland  (yey!)  — right after I’m done with internship

8.   Learn how to ski  (or even snowboard — again) — on my list next season

9.   Go to Vegas!!!!!!!!!!!  — sometime this year

10.  Expand my social circle.

11.  Throw away all my junk.

12.  Run more often (that would require a LOT of work LOL).  hmmmm……….. yeah LOL

13.  Speak up.

14.  Go on vacay —   already in the books for next year … wait, do mini-vacays count??????

15.  Take more pictures.

16.  Reconnect with old friends.

17.  Do I dare say fall in love again????  — was just about to but things got a little bit complicated so I’m still holding off  on that thought…..

xoxo

Running on Empty

The café was packed.

She arrived a few minutes ahead of time and found a secluded spot in the far corner. There was a cool breeze and for a moment, she regretted not bringing her coat along. As she scanned the sea of people, she wondered whether she is ready. There’s nothing like the excitement of meeting someone new, although this time, she knew better. Just meet and greet. That’s it.

Five minutes had passed by and she spotted him, standing by the door. Not sure how to proceed, she stood up and gathered all the courage she had, painted a smile on her face and finally walked up to him and introduced herself. He gave her a warm smile and asked her if she had any difficulty finding the place. He led her inside, which thankfully is warm, and thoughtfully inquired whether she is a coffee drinker. She said not really but does have a cup every now and then. She looked up the menu and asked him what he recommends. Funny thing is that they were both thinking of ordering the same thing — blended white chocolate hazelnut. Hmmm…. like minds think alike? As they waited for their drinks, she was suprised at how easy the flow of conversation was. From the basics to more insightful stuff.  Easy banter back and forth. Plus those eyes. They never wavered. But they didn’t unnerve her either. Those baby blue eyes held her gaze as they talk  just about everything and anything. Like nothing else mattered. Like no one else mattered. Only her. Or maybe she’s only a sucker for baby blues……

So as they were finishing their drinks, he asked her whether she has walked around the campus at Stanford. She was caught off guard because just a few days ago she was telling her cousins that they should go to Stanford one of these days because she has never been. She was a little freaked out by his question.  Coincidence? Or is the Universe finally telling her something?  She gathered her composure and told him no, and he graciously offered to accompany her. It didn’t take her a heartbeat to say Yes! After all if indeed the Universe is conconcting some plan, who is she to go against it? Who is she to contradict what the stars have aligned for her? In the back of her head was a little voice, taunting, ” I thought you didn’t believe in destiny? Ha! “   Well, fate, schmate — she is taking this chance.

They walked to his car and like the gentleman that he is, opened the door for her.  They cruised along El Camino and made the turn somewhere to Stanford. She couldn’t help but notice that he was running on empty. Like the needle was on red. And like the I-don’t-let-my-tank-go-past-half  kind of girl that she is, it started to make her squeamish. It took all her self-control not to tell him that his tank is empty but thankfully they finally arrived at the parking lot.  As she stepped out of the car, her eyes widened. The view took her breath away. Eventhough it was dark, the stars were out, even the moon. They started walking towards the church, with a beautiful mural painted on the outside and that beautiful stained glass window in the midst of it all. The silence between them never felt uncomfortable. In a way, it felt natural. That they didn’t need words to fill in the stillness of the night.  They stopped by a parked bench and talked about the little things that seem unimportant, but in more ways than one, it actually is.  As time seemed to stand still, the doubt in her mind began to fade away.  She knew she is finally ready. 

They finally stood up and walked back to the car, retracing their steps, learning more about the other.  And as they drove back, him running on empty didn’t bother her one bit.  As first dates go, this is definitely one of the most unconventional but most romantic. Coffee, a great guy, a moonlit walk, great conversation — what more could a girl ask for? And if ever the car did stall in the middle of University Avenue?  She wouldn’t have mind pushing.

xoxo